Chew Before You Buy
Every lot comes with a 30-second sample window so bidders can assess quality by mouth. Most lots do not survive the sample window. The seller is notified and paid in sympathy.
BY ORDER OF THE HERD
Everything is edible. Some of it is also for sale.
Browse is the peer-to-peer marketplace where goats list, bid on and immediately eat secondhand goods. 41,000 lots were consumed before their auctions closed last quarter. We count every one of those as a sale.
Popular this week: fence postslaundrya hatcardboard (wet)
3,112lots listed since breakfast
9%of lots survive to the closing bell
2.1average fence-post seller rating, unchanged
CONDITIONS OF SALE
How the barn runs
Read aloud by the auctioneer before every sale. Nobody has listened yet.
Headbutt to Bid
Bids are placed by striking the device firmly with the forehead. One headbutt raises the bid by one mouthful. Our hardware partners have stopped returning our calls, which we read as confidence.
Fence-Post Seller Ratings
Sellers are scored out of five posts for honesty, shipping speed and whether the item arrived already partly eaten. The marketplace average is 2.1 posts and has been 2.1 posts since launch.
FROM THE BIDDING FLOOR
Satisfied bidders
I won a wicker chair on Thursday. It was gone by Thursday. Five stars, would win again.
Pepper HalvorsenHead of Procurement, Halvorsen Family Hobby Farm (Nigerian Dwarf, age 4)
I listed my owner's car cover as gently used. By the time the buyer showed up, I had also used it. Browse issued the refund and did not ask a single question.
DoloresTop-Rated Reseller since spring, Lot Volume Leader for the Tri-County Paddock Region
We moved all fence procurement onto Browse in Q2. Fence spend is down 40 percent, mostly because we no longer have a fence.
Gerald P. WhitcombVP of Perimeter Strategy, Whitcomb Dairy Goats LLC
MEMBERSHIP AT THE SALE BARN
Pick a paddle
Billed monthly. Paddles are non-refundable and, in our experience, non-recoverable.
PADDLE 01
Kid
$0 / month
For goats under one year and their impulse control.
- Bid on up to 3 lots a day
- Standard 30-second sample window
- Listings from adjacent farms only
PADDLE 02
Nanny & Billy
$14 / month
The household plan. One account, two goats, constant disputes.
- Unlimited headbutt bidding
- Shared watchlist neither goat respects
- Priority access to laundry-line listings
PADDLE 03
Herd Manager
$380 / month per herd
For operations of 12 or more goats and one exhausted human.
- Bulk bidding on fencing
- A dedicated account goat
- Annual on-site audit of what got eaten
The gavel falls at sundown.
Today's lots include a garden hose, two left gloves and a tax return from 2019. One of those already has a bid.